the other day my friends and I were on the way to an abandoned parking garage. i was driving. i told them I was about to ask/confess something kind of personal. “do you guys ever get scared of doing too many drugs or just going overboard with something, because you’re afraid that your mind is already so unstable and fragile that it would just deteriorate at the seams and you’d go crazy?” personally, i would expect this to be common. I know I’m not crazy, maybe it’s my tendency to overanalyze but I feel like with the way my parents are and the way I was raised, I’m like a ticking time bomb waiting to go off, to go completely mad, & i’m not even sure what i’d go mad with, perhaps resentment or anger or dejection but still.
anyways, after I said that, i was met with a brief silence, don’t remember what they said. i wonder about that. were they afraid to admit that they felt the same way, or did they truly not feel the same? is that how it is with most people, like how people can be afraid to admit they’re hurt or broken or angry or sad? or am I really the only one that feels like my brain is already so loosely tied together?
and such, by thinking these thoughts, is my mentality more stable than theirs because i’m aware of this possible downfall?
i had a lot of thoughts about this. maybe more to come
Anonymous asked: sexuality?
lol. Well i’ve been attracted to/acted on those attractions with both genders so not 100% straight. i like what i like i guess
i like girls who look like they kill people for a living
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